Tips for cancer survivors on dating, new relationships
By Mayo Clinic staffOriginal Article: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/cancer-and-dating/MY02011
- With Mayo Clinic nurse educator
Sheryl M. Ness, R.N.
read biographyclose windowBiography of
Sheryl M. Ness, R.N.
Sheryl M. Ness
Sheryl Ness, R.N., O.C.N., is a nurse educator for the Cancer Education Program at Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn. She helps inform patients, families and caregivers about services and resources to help them through the cancer journey.
She has a master's degree in nursing from Augsburg College. In addition, she is an assistant professor of oncology at the College of Medicine, Mayo Clinic, and is certified as a specialist in oncology nursing. Sheryl has worked for more than 20 years at Mayo Clinic as an educator. She has a keen interest in the importance of the quality of life and concerns of people living with cancer.
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Living with cancer blog
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Feb. 21, 2012
Tips for cancer survivors on dating, new relationships
By Sheryl M. Ness, R.N.
Let's talk about dating as a cancer survivor. Entering into a new relationship can be a challenge with or without a cancer diagnosis. Dealing with the emotional and physical changes that may have come with your cancer diagnosis can add to the situation. Many people find that dating after a diagnosis of cancer can be a much different experience than before a cancer diagnosis.
A few of the challenges might be:
- Dealing with physical changes from effects of surgery or treatment
- Living with fear of recurrence
- How to tell someone new that you have a cancer history
- Fear of a negative reaction
- Changes in fertility
- Sexual intimacy concerns
However challenging this is, you may also find that you have positive changes that may impact new relationships. These may include:
- A new sense of knowing exactly what you want and need from a relationship
- An appreciation of time spent with others
- A renewed interest in establishing a long-term relationship with a life partner
You may be interested in dating again, but concerned about the first steps in meeting someone new. Here are a few ideas to get you started:
- Get involved in social activities in your community — taking that first step is important (art and music events, group outings, festivals, sporting events, etc.)
- Talk to other survivors about their experiences with dating
- If you have emotional concerns that have not been addressed, connect with a counselor or peer support group to work through any negative emotions and fears
- Explore ideas on how you might communicate your history of cancer to a new person — practice with a friend who knows you well
Please share your experiences, ideas and thoughts on this topic with each other.
Follow me on Twitter @SherylNess1. Join the discussion at #livingwithcancer.
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