Dementia

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• May 21, 2013 3:08 a.m.

  Thanks for the blog on the different aspects between altzeimers and dementia. When set out in the way you have, the confusion and frustration previously experienced has been cleared up.2yhm46

  - jim

• May 14, 2013 1:50 p.m.

  Can Encephalitis cause dementia?StWE3E

  - Annettr

• April 27, 2013 11:15 a.m.

  I am a nurse specializing in geriatric care for several years now. I stumbled upon this bog while looking for more information to give family members on how to cope with the changes in thier loved one. I watch day in and day out people that come into my community with mild memory imparment and decline rapidly, some at a slower rate and the tole it takes on a loved one. My best advice is to hang onto the momory of the person that was there before because they are gone now, this new person in front of you is scared they don't recognize thier surroundings, don't see a fimilar face any longer. They are now like a small child that has been left alone at daycare for the first time they require a lot of patience, gentle reminders, and love. If you have found your self in place that you are to easily fustrated or causing yourself distress it is time to find help! There are many options out there ranging from a personal sitter that will comeout to your house and sit for a period of time with them allowing you a break, to adult daycare centers, there are also full time places such as assisted living facilities that are excellent in providing care. Keep in mind if you stress yourself to the point it takes a toll on your health then who will be left to care for both of you?

  - Ceri

• April 27, 2013 Midnight

  I am 60 years old. After numerous tests, the last of which was a Pet/ct scan, I received the shocking diagnosis of Alzheimer's. my mother has Dementia, but she is 90 years old. I do not plan to tell my children, ages 33, 30, and 29, until I have the blood test done to see if I have "the gene". If I do, my doctor, a neurologist, believes my children should be tested to see if they too have the gene. I am so angry! This is like a bad dream. My husband will retire next year. I have 2 young grandchildren. My only daughter is getting married in October. I am fearful that my daughter-in-laws will not allow me to babysit for my grandchildren when they find out. My husband mentioned today that we should maybe think about divorcing so that my illness does not eat up his retirement. I am horrified. I am angry with God. My vision is poor, I have osteoporosis, stomach ulcers, and if all of that wasn't enough to take the fun out of life, I now have the big "A". I am whining and I don't usually do this. I feel like I have been handed a death sentence. I hate the stigma of Alzheimer's . I do not want anyone to know. I am embarrassed. I hated to get my medicines filled. I did not want the people in the pharmacy to know. My neurologist is sending the report to my family doctor. I don't want him or the employees in his office to know. I am afraid that it may progress very quickly. Do these fears ever go away?

  - Katrinka

• April 23, 2013 10:13 a.m.

  Patience and more Patience! One copes with AD by forcibly reminding oneself that the issue at hand, and many arise daily, is but a passing moment for the afflicted, and refusing to dwell on it. The only answer is to move forward. The difficult moment is gone. Outside activity is wholesome for the primary caregiver and to resume normal activities as often as possible. As stated, AD is difficult if caring for a parent, and then again another scenario when caring for a spouse. Realization that the man I married was no longer the same person, required the asumption of many duties I had not been accustomed to and the remaking of a life totally foreign. I repeat .. patience and prayer!

  - June

• April 21, 2013 9:23 p.m.

  Hello, maybe I misunderstood but I do not understand why it was said that U cannot be diagnosed with Alzheimer's unless U have died and had a particular biopsy from the brain... so many people are diagnosed with this disease so again, I do not understand or simply misunderstood.... TY if U can explain further....

  - Ali

• April 20, 2013 5:24 p.m.

  My husband and I are caregivers to his mother for 8 months out of the year. The last two years have been the worst. We have been told that she had alzimers all along but we finally took her to a doctor who told us she has moderate to severe dementia. I am currently on sever depression medication and by-polar so it takes longer for it to effect me. My husband on the other hand looses his temper a lot. I'm actually afraid that he is going to have a heart attach. Everyone says I'm lucky I don't work, they've never taken care of someone in mom's shape.

  - Shirley

• April 20, 2013 11:09 a.m.

  I have a sister in assisted living but I just can't believe the things she does like take blouses of the hangers, throws them on the foot locker and says the aides did that. She eats three meals a day but also eats all the snacks I bring her. Also, says the housekeeper or aides ate it all. That they go into her cupboards to look for sweets. It's always someone else did this or that ....she is never wrong but if I point blank as her why she did that, she will throw it in my face that I'm sticking up for them or I don't believe her. Some times when I leave her and come home I feel really down. It's unbelievably. I do go to a social worker to talk things over but sometimes it doesn't help. She gets the best of me. Some days I would just like to forget that she is there. I'm sorry but that's how I feel but in reality I won't forsake her. She still is my sister.

  - armella

• April 15, 2013 12:04 a.m.

  My father, 97,wasdiagnosed with dementia about 3 months ago. We believe it may have surfaced from a previous stroke or the High Blood pressure he has had to deal with for the past 20 years. It has been very difficult to see him lose touch with reality. Especialy for my 14 year old daughter,his granddaughter. We hope to get him professional help and we will also seek counseling for our family...it is heartbreaking to see a loved one go down this path....but i hope to educate my self and my family more about this desease..

  - Mari Cz

• April 7, 2013 11:51 p.m.

  My husband of 57 years died last July on our anniversary date, dealing with vascular dementia and at the very last, a return of a congested heart, which had been repaired 17 years prior to this. Mostly, he was strong physically, but I had noticed memory lapses, poor judgement and other subtle signs for 15 years. We were blessed in that we had moved into a continuing care retirement community. As he grew to being more confused, wandering away, and not knowing his way home,day or night, I was able to place him into a secure place, right in another part of my independent living area, where he received compassionate and good care. He had become very hostile, and when this became difficult for me, another neighbor, who also had her husband in care reminded me, that this not my husband speaking, but rather the disease showing itself. Somehow that helped me let the words "roll off" and address him and care for him-- as the man I used to know and respect. He continued to be very verbal- had been a leader of groups for many years, and still felt like he needed to keep things in his control. It took some rather innovative and clever ways to allow him to feel like he still had the ability to make some of his own decisions, yet be safe. Enough time has gone, and I gladly remember the man that I fell in love with those many years ago, and can enjoy such happy memories of our lives together.

  - Glad

• April 6, 2013 9:23 p.m.

  I recently had a brain MRI and was told that the front part of my brain shows shrinking. Now the neurologist I'm going to told me he doesn't know if I was born that way or if it is actually shrinking because I don't have mri's from past years. Is there anything else I can ask to have done to find this out? I am 46 years old and he said that the radiologist said something about premature for dementia or premature dementia, honestly i can't remember because I was so upset hearing about the shrinking of the brain. Please advise if possible. Thank you.

  - Lisa

• April 4, 2013 5:35 p.m.

  My husband of 40 years has Alzheimer's disease. He was diagnosed 8 years ago. I am sole caretaker, although having been wise and lucky we have long term care insurance so a daycare program is covered week days and gives me 6 hrs a day to myself. That is a lifesaver, I go to the gym, take classes and see friends, I am only 65. I have grieved for so long, now I think I am just tired and move through the paces of each day. It is a sad and lonely existence.

  - Nan

• April 4, 2013 4:13 p.m.

  My mother in law has vascular dementia and has lives with us for over 1 1/2 years.She is 86 and very independent. She had a heart valve replaced in 2005 and wonder if that did not start it all?? Found a few things very helpful: 1. I quit thinking of her as a relative and began treating her as my patient. This helps me not take anything personal. 2. I quit totally respecting her privacy. I found out the hard way that bathing, brushing teeth changing clothes was not happening. Now I check on everything like she is a child. 3. She sleeps in her clothes because she cannot remember how to dress and cannot remember where her clothes are, even though she rearranges her drawers constantly. 4. I let he sleep in her clothes. One less battle. 5. I let her eat her lunch and dinner in front of a John Wayne movie. She loves them. Any western, really. 6. She fools EVERYBODY. Even her physician. I bought her an Alzheimer bracelet from Medic ID on line. She cannot get it off. Stainless. It helps when she is trying to fool people. You just point to the bracelet. 7. People do not understand the term "vascular dementia". But they do understand "Alzheimer's Disease". So I stopped telling people she has dementia.

  - Marsha

• April 2, 2013 10:03 p.m.

  I just discovered this site and blog; have read only a few comment posts, and this will be my first post. I am an 84 year-of-age caregiver for my 82 year-old-spouse who is in the "severe" stage of dementia, doctors describe as Alszheimer's type. We've been struggling/dealing with this problem for 8-9 years; she was evaluated and "certified" by a neurologist 7 years ago and her symptoms have steadily declined over that period. She has lost 98% of all language ability, no reading, writing, understanding spoken language; she follows nothing on TV, but is occassionally amused briefly with cartoon channels, sometimes Animal Planet. She never asks or otherwise "demand" anything; never complains. my only sing of pain or discomfort is body language; never aggressive or abusive, displays her appreciation and gratefulness to me in 2-3-second episodes of lucid behaviors, perhaps a brief pat. embrace, and in rare occassions a simple "I love you." This is the only complete verbal statement I'heard from her in about 3 years! She hasn't initiated a trip to the bath room in 5 years at least; I read body language messages and am quite successful with it. I started out getting her to the commode a couple times during the night but this was not successful. She adjusted to "depends" about 5-6 years ago and we use them 24-7; it's been months since we've had to deal with a "No. 2" accident. In the early "changing" stages she was

  - Kermit

• March 25, 2013 12:17 p.m.

  In the last month my husband has experienced visions, hallucinations, anxiety, fear that someone would kidnap his grandchildren, and thinking he would die. He is only 65 years old. He has had Cat scans, blood tests, EKG's and other brain scans. We are frustrated because we don't know what is going on. He is very emotional and cries easily. One Doctor put him on 2 tablets of Donepezil and it seems to increase the visions. He is now taking 4 tablets of Divalproex twice daily with one Donepezil at night. Please give me any advice you can to help him. Thank you

  - Lifetime friend

• March 19, 2013 8:10 p.m.

  Hello everyone, I have a family member who is suffering from Alzheimers for about 10 years now. At first I noticed that she was forgetful and couldn't remember names. It progressively got worse over the years and she is unable to walk, talk, read or write. One good thing is that she is not aggressive.. I have done some research and have known people through the years that have family members whom were diagnosed with this disease and each one is so different in its own way. To everyone who has someone close going through this just try to be as patience and reach out for help if needed whether it be having a home health nurse come a few hours a day to help out. Also I have heard that sometimes introducing things that the individual loved to do as a hobby, for example, gardening, playing golf, folding towels, etc... Thank you all for sharing your stories!

  - dee

• March 6, 2013 5:57 p.m.

  I'm 47 my mum has Alzheimer's me and my brother notice sines when our sister died 8 year ago, her mum had it and lived with us, so we new , she may have the first stages of it , we both went to see her doctor , who was so unhelpful even so now , 18 months ago ,we were told by the Alzheimer's society doctor that she had it ,her doctor is still unhelpful , after all this time , my lovey mum has become very angry and hates me and my brother , I try my best with her but do nothing right in her eyes ,I no it's the illness ,but it so sad it's like I've lost my wonderful mum , is anyone going through the same ,please let me no x

  - Lisa

• March 3, 2013 4:59 a.m.

  All of your comments are helpful to me as a caregiver. My husband is in severe stage of alz. A man who has never said an unkind word to anyone threw his dinner plate across the room and shook the living daylights out of me all due to having a dr. appt. the next day when it would be raining. I know it is the alz but completely freaked out. knocked over all furniture, went into our home office and tore it apart. Have put it all back together without question but is this something i can expect to become the "norm"?

  - shellbell

• March 3, 2013 4:45 a.m.

  All of your comments are helpful to me as a caregiver. My husband is in severe stage of alz. A man who has never said an unkind word to anyone threw his dinner plate across the room and shook the living daylights out of me all due to having a dr. appt. the next day when it would be raining. I know it is the alz but completely freaked out. knocked over all furniture, went into our home office and tore it apart. Have put it all back together without question but is this something i can expect to become the "norm"?

  - shellbell

• February 22, 2013 3:49 p.m.

  So good to read the comments posted. So many different cases -- none the same. All of us looking for answers. I just talked to our mother's doctor and he told us that mom has a very severe case of dementia. When she is more lucid yet still in another place and time, she is easy to care for. Today we learned that we should let her sleep but gently suggest that she get up to go to the bathroom or to the kitchen to eat or to get dressed. We were trying to talk reason with her about all these things and were failing and becoming miserable because we seemed to be making her miserable. Our doctor said to worry most about eating and cleaning her after potty episodes. That has been such a relief to know that if I just take care of the cleaning whether she cooperates or not; and if I present the food but include a vitamin supplemental drink; that doing that is as much as we can do. I wish I could get both her (89 years) and my father in law to do things like crossword puzzles or play cards. Mom used to love to play gin rummy -- but according to her she's been too busy lately :}. The doctor said she has the sundowner's syndrome of dementia -- so I have to look that up. It is also a relief to read that all of you have similar problems. Thank you for all the comments.

  - Grace

• February 15, 2013 6:36 p.m.

  To Ann, I just read your post. It really sounds as if your parents (mom especially) need assistance. My husband has Dimentia (which is progressing very fast). I am only 46 years old and it is extremely difficult to keep up with the needs, moods and behaviors of the person with this disease. I cannot imagine how your mother is coping, being an older person. I can barely manage and I am a high functioning person (3 kids, a dog, big family and a job). Please help your mom, even if she's not asking for it herself. If you google Alzheimer's caregiver support you will find resources in your county that will help you make the decisions that you now really need to make for the sake of your loved ones. Best wishes for you.

  - Kim

• February 15, 2013 11:25 a.m.

  I have been looking at the comments posted, and haven't seen any one mention whether or not any of the patients have had major bone surgery in their past, prior to the onset of the Dementia or Alz. My mother-in-law (83)has dementia and now lives with us, and my dad's wife (80) has Alz. Both had hip and/or knee surgery 3-4 years prior to the onset of the disease. I also have friends who's parents have the disease, and they also have had major bone surgery several years before the onset of Alz. or dementia. I am wondering if there is any connection?

  - Sharen

• February 15, 2013 6:33 a.m.

  I am 74 and when I tried to renew my drivers license I need a doctor to sign. I found out after a CT that I had "normal" brain shrinkage and passed some small tests with a score of 26 out of 30. My neurologist told me to let him know when I wanted to start Aricept or something like that. My short term memory is but I am functioning - a few burning up the pan of the stove, but am wearing a gizmo now I set it for 4 min. and a bell rings. Not sure how to think of future...move near realatives, hire someone to live with me in my small efficency apt with dog and 2 cats. Am updating Will. My mother died in 1995 of Alz type disease- she was in a home with locked doors so she wouldnt wander. I have always thought I would like to end my life instead of using up my money on a home..Can't see living without a mind to read, have conversation, etc. So glad to find this blog. Thanks and best wishes to all.

  - Judy

• February 10, 2013 6:49 p.m.

  I am writing in regard to my very physically healthy 71 year old sister. She has been diagnosed with a "rare case of Alz". My reaction to this is that the diagnostic Dr. didn't have a clue what her problem is so this was the easiest label. She was on eye drops for glaucoma for may years. I think she had very adverse reactions to these drops ie: loss of memory, blackening of the skin around her eye, and now legal blindness, although I personally saw her pick up a small piece of paper on the floor without thinking a think of it. I am searching for someone who may be suffering from these same symtoms. I don't believe this is a true case of Alz. I think the eye drops have led to her current condition. I'm just looking for some resolve. I don't think she fits the typical Alz patient. Do you know of other cases where it involves and eye brain association?

  - Patti

• January 31, 2013 1:37 p.m.

  My parents are in their 80's . My Dadis diagnosed with Alz. my Mom is not diagnosed. They live independently in their own home and I live 5 hrs away. I am seeing rapid change in my Momwho is the caregiver? She is getting confused and repeating the same stories and forgets info I give her only moments after I give it to her. She is able to pay bills via cheque in the quiet of her own home but when paying for items in a store she is confused about the money. She withdraws large amounts of $$ to as she is to stubborn to change banks to something closer to home. They will not take public transportation and have only recently agreed to take a taxi to appt. They insist on being on their own. I handle most problems when they arise from here via phone. I try to go over at least once a month and stay for a few days to help as much as I can and to see how they are really doing. They are not open to having help come in . My Dad is deaf and the volume on the t.v. is so loud I can hear it clearly on the phone. My poor Mom is beside herself sometimes. My Dad does raise his fist and cane to her if she is on the phone for too long . I don't think my Mom would tell me if he hit her. I worry and am not sure I am doing right by them not insisting they make a change I do suggest it though. I am told I will know when it is time. They resist talking about other choices of living . I feel it is time to have them accessed but know they would resist that as well they can hold things together short

  - Ann