Alzheimer's disease

Free

E-Newsletters

Subscribe to receive the latest updates on health topics. About our newsletters

• Housecall
• Alzheimer's caregiving
• Living with cancer

• February 22, 2008 11:47 p.m.

  My husband is 74 years old. I am 67. He has had dementia for about 4 years. He is on Arisept and Namenda and they seem to be holding off the dementia and possibly the alzheimers pretty well. I have my children near me and they are very loving and supportive and also very helpful. But there is a lonelyness for me to see a little bit of him slip away ever so often. Most of the time I am very able to handle this but sometimes, like tonight, it is so hard. He is trying so hard to hold on to his independence. He is also suffering from massive blood clots in his legs which has caused him to be hospitalized many times. My prayer is that I will stay well long enough to help him here in my home as Jean did. I have the faith that God will see me and especially him through this. Regina

  - Regina

• February 22, 2008 10:24 a.m.

  My mother died of Alzheimer's one year ago today. The disease had her for 8 years. But not only did the disease have her, it also had my dad, my brother & his wife, my spouse & children and me. I've survived depression and have been on a spiritual awakening journey for the past year. God has held us in the palm of His hand but it has been difficult. Loosing myself as I lost mother is something I didn't understand going into the process. What I see now, that was veiled at the time, I just didn't have the energy to keep up with all the details. And when I could get it all done, I depleted my adrenaline reserve. It is a tough rode that is laced with many tender moments. Finding a closer relationship with God is the blessing in all of this. Getting help for yourself is not selfish because you impact many relationships. What you do for your sanity may just preserve the families as well.

  - Sandra

• February 17, 2008 5:52 p.m.

  Thanks and God's blessings to everyone engaged in this blog. Caregivers sacrifice so much, but I think also gain much more than they bargain for, whether the caregiving duty is implied or imposed. At least this had been my experience. Like Di, my father was Mom's sole caregiver, but a brief illness took his life, and my brother and I had to step in. I left a full-time career to help Mom, and feel this is the best(and toughest--or is that the easiest?) decision I've ever had to make. Thus far, the experience has been very rewarding. I have received mixed opinions on giving up "my life" to help with Mom's, but fortunately my husband(whose opinion is the only one that counts) has been very supportive in this endeavor. I am unable to get out to a support group, but this blog had certainly been a great substitute.

  - Jean

• February 13, 2008 7:19 p.m.

  This has to be the most difficult question to answer, as my husband (72) and I have always done everything together. Our lives were intertwined in our family business, our children, grandchildren and our devotion to God & Country with the American Legion & Auxiliary. I have been telling myself that I must start "my Life" but it is almost impossible to think of losing someone you shared 47 years with. He still knows me and our children..and when I come every day he has a big smile and is happy to see me. I take care of some of his personnal needs, for my sake... he seems to love my touch. He is in a great AZ facility where they care for him so well. A special Val dinner is planned for tomorrow for all of us. I don't know if I will be able to handle a new beginning for myself if he passes before me. I also journal quit often. This blog is great and I appreciate reading everyones comments. God bless you all, and give us the strength to go on.

  - Mary

• February 10, 2008 3:57 p.m.

  My mom is 84 yrs. old and as Jean put it, Alzheimer's has had her for about 12 years, probably longer. My dad cared for her single-handedly, with no help, except for my semi-annual visits (we lived 2200 mi. away). Mom came to live with my husband and I two years ago when dad died unexpectedly. I retired from my 30 year career to stay home with her and it really seems to have been a good decision. She is rarely physically ill, and still enjoys getting her hair and nails done, going for rides in the car and "visiting" with friends who occasionally stop by. While we have no other family living nearby, my husband is very good about staying with mom a couple of hours most days so I can go to the gym, take the dog for a walk or go shop. We also have been fortunate to get several hours a week respite care from our local Aging Services. One of the Alzheimer Care facilities in our city provides overnight respite care which has been a godsend. I don't journal, but take lots of pics, la

  - Di

• February 9, 2008 12:19 a.m.

  My husband is 83 years old and has had AD for 6 years now. I still care for him at home with the help and support of my family and friends. He goes to an adult daycare once or twice a week which gives me a couple of days for myself. They love him at the daycare as he is still the genetleman. He is easy to care for and is able to to care for some of his personal needs but is always happy to have my help. What ever I say or do is O.K.with him. It breaks my heart that he doesn't know me anymore. We will have our 60th anniversary in July and by then he won't even know it. Sometimes he will ask for Teresa and I'm standing right in front of him. He thinks of Teresa as the young girl he married. We do a lot of hugging and he is still so loving. Perhaps he thinks he has a new girlfriend. I also keep a jounal on my computer and I am reminded of how much he has lost as I read where he was last year. I think it is good to keep a journal so one can maintain a perspective as changes occur.

  - Teresa

• February 8, 2008 1:22 p.m.

  Susan: My journaling takes but a minute, and is nothing fancy. I'm embarrassed to say that my "journal" is a ringbound notebook that is worn and ragged. Surely you can carve out a moment for yourself even once-a-week to jot down any highlights you may recall? Bring your journal and treat yourself at your favorite designer coffee shop(or like me, at Mom's kitchen table). Hopefully collecting your thoughts and emotions will help you maintain perspective when all seems so out-of-control.

  - Jean

• February 7, 2008 9:24 p.m.

  Thanks, Jean, for this insight. I may not think I have time for journaling, but I can certainly pay more attention to remembering the "real" bits and pieces. Many "bad" days still have positive periods, and the "good" days, or hours, can be delightful.

  - Susan

• February 6, 2008 8:19 p.m.

  Mom is 88 and has had Alzheimer's for 10 years. Or rather, it has had her. At any rate, I share caregiver responsibilty with my brother. Mom is in late-stage Alzheimer's. Thankfully, we are still able to meet Mom's ever-increasing needs in her own home. I have elected to deal with the loss of the person I once knew by getting to know better the person Mom is now. Fortunately, she is delightful, and funny, and still elicits bits and pieces of her personality---the "real" Mom. I have resigned myself to the loss of the abilities she once had and dwell on the abilities she still has, limited though they may be. I find that by journaling my daily interactions I can revisit each day's highlights; despite the ebb and flow of good-days and bad-days, I will always have a written chronicle of those events I hold most dear, which will likely provide comfort in the future.

  - Jean