Depression (major depression)

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• January 19, 2012 1:18 p.m.

  I would like to respond to: Name Does Not Matter from October 24, 2011. I realized that it is difficult having to deal with this depression illness that we all have and hopefully some of their stories will give others hope and feedback to those that feel hopeless. Currently there is no cure, just the hope that one of the many medications will work or more than one. For my current remission I take two different medications at twice the normal dose. I do believe that the brain being such a complex organ that it is that there is much for scientists to learn about how it works and doesn't work. From this blog I have learned that what works for one person does not necessarily work for others. I have hope that more will be learned and better treatments are on the horizon for the many of us with the diagnosis of a mental illness.I would like to mention here that therapy along with medications finally is why I am currently "balanced". I realize that finding a good therapist and psychiatrist is time consuming but necessary. Please do not perserve with those that are not helping you. I had several of both before hitting "gold" and that took several years. I perserved with the bad ones, not a good idea. I finally had the courage to move on, best thing you can do.As I have mentioned some time ago there is a test called CYP450 that will show how you metabolize the anti-depression meds and you might need a different dose like me. Ask your psychiatrist for a script, it i

  - 777hope

• January 18, 2012 11:20 p.m.

  I have had depression almost all of my life and I'm in therapy andhave been onmany types of meds,which work for a while and then do not.I currantly can'sleep,my dsys are at nights.I take my meds and I do not drink or use illegal drugs.I have a big history of trama and I found out,late in life I had a biological mother with severe depression.I've had shock treatments in my teens and I'll never get over that hell.This past 2 years has been very hard.My husband began deteriorating from Parkinsons disease andhe lost our house and will loose the car next,I've just gotton a lagal seperation and now live alone.I'm 54years old and I also returned to school to study psychology but left whenI lost faith in the profession.I had a therapist for8 years,she told me she loved me,spanked me,etc and then after all the years and gifts and stuff.she wrote me a letter one day and Told me how she never really loved me,it was only a theraputic technique...I reported her but I was basically not believed and instesd of holding her responcible for boundaries they basically said it was my faultetc,etc.I know since then whats it's like to feel like one whohas been so hurt by the system that I really don't believe too much init.It took me 15 years to be able to just start to see another professional again.Anyway, this ,and my knowlege of the professionhas not helped metoo much.And now everything is dying or lost around me and still,THE BEST is yet to come..slowly watching my x die.I want out,no hope lef

  - deborah

• January 17, 2012 2:34 p.m.

  Dear Denise sorry to hear you are not feeling good. hope the new med you found can help you feel good again. like in Michigan we have no snow here. people like us suffering from this illness need the warmth of the sun. I feel little bit better but sometimes just feel it especially when something is bothering me or worried about my children or somebody hurt my feeling am somewhat very sensitive and I hate it. well have to learn to be strong just like you never give up. yes am glad that I met you, somebody that I can talk to, somebody to remind myself that no matter how hard it is, I will never lose my hope. thank you to be my friend. take care and you are always in my prayers everyday.

  - Annette

• January 16, 2012 10:13 p.m.

  After many years if depression and knowing the effects it has had on my life, I dont think there is much hope left for me.

  - KC

• January 16, 2012 2:09 p.m.

  dear phil: i'm glad u wrote in & welcome to the blog, those psychiatrists were wrong in telling u they had nothing left to offer you!! talk about not giving a person any hope-how dare they!! i'm just a patient like you so anything i say here is just my opinion-u didn't say to much about any of your symptoms?? do you have low energy?? i take ritalin (methylphenidate) 4 energy-have u tried that?? i also take abilify for mood balance & depression & also lamictal for the same things-have you tried any of these, i no how frustrating it can get trying new meds., dealing with the side effects & then they don't work or u can't tolerate the side effects!! i tell my dr. to put me on something for only 2 wks.-if i can tolerate the side effects & i see a some change-i will stay on it, but nasty side effects or no change i don't stay on them, i research another drug on-line & suggest it to my dr. & he has been sooo good as 2 go along with me, after all we no our bodies best!! have u tried vyvanse (ADHD med.)it gives you energy, there's a new (fairly new) drug called viibyrd-works fast with few side effects, get a new psych. dr. (my suggestion) if you haven't already?? do some research on-line & i hope this info. helps you, good luck & write back and let me know how you're doing-if you want to??

  - denise

• January 15, 2012 6:46 p.m.

  Dear Denise...SO SO sorry you are not feeling well. Please dont get to down on yourself .Give your self time and you will be up and about in no time . thank you so much for the kind words .No matter what is going on with me ,I never give up time with my family .I can get rest later .Need to be with them .Am going through a real hard spot right now .Have taken a little time off from therapy Not telling anyone out there that taking time away from therapy is something to do . I have an amazing sopport team of family members ,. Just need to take a little time for me .,And be with my family . Please take care of you . You are in my thoughts .Write soon .

  - kam

• January 14, 2012 3:03 p.m.

  dear annette & kam: am kinda suffering a set-back to i think?? have still had this annoying cough (even though it's gotten better)-i just don't have the desire to do things like i would like to have (i no part of it is because it's winter here in michigan) snow & cold but not much snow @ all-better not say that out loud!! dear kam: i give u a lot of credit-having evry 1 @ ur house 4 Christmas-that's a lot of work!! glad the grandchildren were all there & all had a good time!! like u said that's what it's all about!! i no ur not real happy bout tryin new meds. but i'm gonna ask my dr. to put me on "vyvanse"-it's an adhd med. that is a stimulant-very little side effects-from what i've read, haven't seen dr. since dec. 5th-had 2 cancel dec. 27th appt. with being sick-that's a long time 4 me 2 go w/o!! don't worry @ all i'm always thinkin' of u & ur in my prayers-hope you're feelin' better soon!! dear annette: hope ur doin' better than u were?? meds. do work differently from 1 manu. to the next-they have with me anyways, i find that the generic 2 don't work 4 me, so i always have to have dr. write 'scripts 4 the brand name, i'm glad u found this web-site (not only to help u with info., but of course so that we could meet & talk), hope u get 2 feelin' better soon-look up the "vyvanse" drug (if u want to & if u need a "stimulant" drug) you're in my thoughts & prayers-write when u can

  - denise

• January 11, 2012 8:01 p.m.

  Dear Annette and Denise ,Christmas was a stressfull time for the family .We were all together at my home .Thank god .We had a very sad family issue .We made it a wonderful day for the grandchildren .After all thats what christmas is all about .They had an amazing day ! Depression hit me very hard . Am still trying to get myself together .Am not real open to trying new meds .Am very tired of the side effects . Hope you are well . dont give up on me . Not on the computer much .You are always in my thoughts. take care .

  - kam

• January 10, 2012 3:10 p.m.

  I have had major depression for 28 years, not associated with any "past event". Drugs and counseling worked well for 10 years. Then a period of minimal help with numerous drugs. In the last 5 years I have had ALL FDA-approved drugs for depression, Intensive Outpatient therapy for a month, disastrous results(permanent antegrade memory loss)from 5 weeks of ECT, no effect from acupuncture. Nobody nearby thinks magnetic treatment would work because of the chronicity and severity of my disease. I managed to work (pathologist) but did get worse after retirement. The few social events/volunteering I do are tolerable but I can be crying by the time I get home. Two psychiatrists very recently have told me they have nothing left to offer me. I'm scared of death so don't consider suicide. WHAT DO I DO NEXT? I WANT, AT LEAST, HOPE!

  - Phil

• January 10, 2012 2:48 p.m.

  continuation: I wish you both good health and as always you`re in my thoughts and prayers.

  - Annette

• January 10, 2012 2:46 p.m.

  Dear Denise and Kam. how are you both. Denise hope your colds and cough are gone by now and you feel better today. Last week was a critical week for me. my depression came back and yesterday at work didn`t feel good. my head was not clear can`t concentrate on my work. 2 weeks ago my dr. went for a vacation, i run out of meds before he will come back so i got my meds by the other dr. after 3 days of taking it I felt my depressed again, was frustrated i thought this med will help me longer at least a yr. told my husband have to try another med and suffer again for the side effects. then i compared the box of my med from my dr and the box of the new one and there is a little difference. called my dr. told my story and he said that is just the same only not the same manufacturer. but i can get the 1st one that am using. so I did. this is the 4 days of taking the ist one. the problem here in my country is are not informed of the meds we are taking is generic or the brand name. glad that i`ve found this site and reading a lot of american sites for depression. dutch site that am visiting has not much infos. and here they don`t consider mental illness as a threatening illness. just pity for other depression sufferers who can`t understand English for they are solely depending on their physicians. because if I didn`t read american sites then i don`t have any knowledge about this. as of now i feel a little bit better and will continue to observe if my meds really stop working.

  - Annette

• January 10, 2012 11:18 a.m.

  dear ashley: i'm glad u wrote in 2 share ur thoughts-please see the toll-free phone no. 4 the suicide hot-line to talk to someone about what ur feeling-they should b able to help u more than we can-still keep writing in to us though-the phone no. is listed above in this posting-i have been there & no how lonely that feeling can be-it's horrible!! u feel like ur never gonna get better or feel normal again-i no i've suffered from depression for more than 30 yrs. now or more?? believe me when i tell you there is "lite @ the end of the tunnel"!! with the rite meds. & some therapy u can get better!! i've been totally non-functioning b 4 & now i'm up & around functioning again, i take methylphenidate (ritalin) 4 energy, abilify & lamictal for my mood/depression & ativan 4 sleep and/or anxiety-do u have a dr.?? if not u may want to see someone so that u can get some kind of treatment-good luck to you, i hope this helped & write back in and let me know how you're doing

  - denise

• January 9, 2012 1:47 p.m.

  Things have been getting harder every day I honestly don't want to go on I'm sick of this life I have no outlet I feel so alone every day its the same thing i can't get out of bed i can't get ready i can't look to a positive day..

  - ashley

• January 8, 2012 11:18 p.m.

  dear larry: i'm glad u wrote in-ur in a very tough spot-if your wife won't go to the dr. there's not a lot that u can do-i no that's not what u want to hear, but if she won't go in maybe someone else can talk her into seeing a psychiatrist (any family member that she'll listen to??) five yrs. is way too long (in my opinion) to have to sit by & watch someone that you love just slowly going "downhill" for a choice of a better word, the dr. calling it "isolation depression"?? i've suffered from depression for over 30 yrs. now & i've never heard of that type of depression, isolating from people is something that people do when they suffer from depression-because we don't want to be around people-for whatever reason?? the best thing i can suggest is that you get a family member or friend that she'll listen to & have them have a serious talk with her & convince her to see a dr.-as soon as possible-start with your family dr. & he/she can rule out any medical reasons for her behavior (thyroid imbalance, low-blood sugar, etc.) & then if the dr. feels she needs to see someone he/she can make a referral for her, i hope this helps you & write in to let me know how you're both doing-good luck to both of you

  - denise

• January 8, 2012 11:00 p.m.

  dear karla: welcome to the blog-ur husband may want to see a professional (either a counselor or a therapist) see if you can get him to go, in my opinion-it sounds like there might be an anger problem-i'm not a professional-just someone that suffers from depression-sometimes anger is a part of depression & it's usually good to express it verbally instead of keeping it inside, but it should be handled with a trained therapist (just my opinion) good luck to you-best thing to do is be a good-listener when he wants to talk & just be there for him when he needs help with anything-write back & let me know how things are going

  - denise

• January 8, 2012 10:49 p.m.

  dear kam & annette: sorry i haven't written lately-have had this annoying cold & cough that i just can't get rid of, when i get it my depression seems to sneak up on me a little, so i've been more down than up, but was out to church 2-day & ran some errands-it felt good to get out of the house!! hope u both r doing well, Christmas tree is still propped up in the corner against the wall (haha) still smells good so i'm leavin it in the apt.-started with the pre-schoolers @ church (teaching them)-it was a lot of fun!! there was only 8 of them to watch, but it seemed like we had 16 of them (lol), they're so cute!! well getting late & getting tired-better go-you're both in my thoughts & prayers

  - denise

• January 8, 2012 2:47 p.m.

  I have been living with depression much too long.Dr.s have been treating me,and trying everything possible.not mush helps.I keep on going,but that awful thing.

  - joan

• January 4, 2012 5:05 p.m.

  All the comments and recommendations regarding depression are good, but what about a husband that is trying to figure out what to do when his wife has no reason to see a doctor otherwise, his wife seems healthy and happy, but won't go outside of the house nor invite people in, and has had two suicides in her family so any discussion of depression is concerns him. They used to travel, but now she won't even go out to dinner or to get groceries with him. His doctor has called it "Isolation Depression", but can't do anything unless he sees her and she doesn't feel a need to see a doctor. Nothing is written about this type of depression that I can find so I don't know what to do to make things better.

  - Larry

• January 4, 2012 4:53 p.m.

  What can a husband do whose wife is healthy & happy, but will not go outside of the house anymore for any reason even to see her children or grandchildren. They used to travel/cruise every year but haven't done anything for 5 years because of this. She won't go to the doctor and the doctor won't prescribe anything without seeing her. I would like to do something before it gets worse and something serious happens. There have been 2 suicides among female members of the maternal side of her family. Help!

  - Larry

• January 3, 2012 11:31 a.m.

  My husband has Major Depression and has for years. But one thing I have noticed is that he blames everything that has happened in his life on everyone else and when really aggetated will say things like "they are all going to pay for this." Is this a part of being depressed? Or something worse? I am at a loss of how to support him through this.

  - Karla

• January 3, 2012 11:23 a.m.

  I have had S.A.D. for most of my life. I am 68 years old and finally understand that I am not a "bad" person; I just have a disorder which impacts my life at this "most happiest time of the year," (so sayety Andy Williams). HAH! I have all the check-points mentioned in the list of points for S.A.D. I have bought a light box. However, I am not on any depression medication. It is so easy to just read and play Scrabble online and disengage. I used to feel sad about not wanting to join in the festivities, but now I just accept the fact that this is a time when I am not able to function on all eight cylinders. I am going to kick myself in the butt and get more active. This lethargy is the pits, and this weight gain is eroding my self-esteem and exascerbating my feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. I feel hungry after I've eaten a meal! Ouch. I've never been a fairy nymph, light and airy, but I don't want to fit in a room with my mouth the doorway either. Well, I'm putting on my fighting face and going for a walk.

  - Catherine

• January 3, 2012 8:03 a.m.

  Dear Mark ,, Im so sorry you are suffering so much . Im not a doctor ,just someone that has felt the pain of PTSD for so many years.Have tryed many meds .Some work ,some didnt .I have a wonderful therapist that I see weekly .I must say I was a little surprised to hear that your Dr. said for you to have alone time .If I can give you any advice it would be to have one or two people that you can call your safty team .you will need to totally trust these people .someone you can be sad ,or angry with ,share all your feeling .Try not to be so hard on yourself .take care .Write when you can .I find that taking one day at a time is very helpful .

  - kam

• January 1, 2012 6:25 p.m.

  Kam, have been taking meds for thee past few years after finally going to doc to get help. This past year has been the hardest in a long time. Had a headache for over four months and now taking med for that too. Got to the point where i asked for someone to talk to about what was going on in my head and went to a physc. After the first visit I started getting more comfortable with him and let out alot of things that I know have carried around with me for years. His answer was to spend more time by myself and to not worry about evrything so much. Followed his advice and now i do even less with my family than i did before. I feel that i am at the point where i just want to give in to the negative feelings and thoughts and see what happens. After over 35 yrs of feeling this way and many opportunities i am just tired of it all. I know that the anxiety issues is because i am anxious for it to stop. Wife and kids will coming home at the end of this weeek and honestly i just dont want to be here, I said before that its like a never ending roller coaster but i feel like this time i can see where the ride stops, This summer when i wnet to the physc i told my doctor that i was scared and wanted help. I am not scared now but kam you are right I am anxious.

  - mark

• January 1, 2012 11:54 a.m.

  Dear Denise and Kam. Happy New Year to both of you and your loved ones. Oh Denise to hear about your christmas tree but well you have something to be busy with hahaha joke only. well my ironing works is getting higher and higher, that I will do coming Tuesday the whole day, so I will try to wake up early hope I can with this a.d. am taking i become a sleepy head. am just thankful am still functional. that is now what I admire of the 2 of you, you are both a fighter. I will always bear that in my head the next time i`ll be in the tunnel again. Like Kam am happy that the holidays are over back to normal life again. I wish you both good health always. nice to hear from you. hope this year will be better for us all and as always you`re always in my thought my prayers.

  - Annette

• December 31, 2011 7:07 p.m.

  Hi Mark The holidays can add a lot of stress on people .Sounds like you are having some anxiety issues . May want to talk to a Dr. There are many things that can help .Good luck

  - kam