With Mayo Clinic women's health nurse practitioner Lois McGuire, R.N., M.S.N., W.H.N.P.

Not long ago, I was asked to present an STD lecture to a singles group, ages 45 and older. Anytime I had been asked to speak about this before, it was for adolescents. I was not sure what this group would want to discuss. It quickly became apparent that the singles group needed the same information as our young people. So here are my tips for everyone on keeping sex "safer."

These suggestions are fairly simple to follow:

• Talk to your partner
• Get STD screening
• Immunize
• Condoms are a must
• Don't mix sex and alcohol or drugs
• Be safe in public settings

The first step is to talk to your partner.
If this type of discussion seems too uncomfortable, then you need to consider whether you are ready to have sex with this person. It is OK not to be ready as a person or as a couple to take this step. When you are ready, it is important to ask you partner about his or her sexual history.

Talk to your provider about appropriate testing to screen for STDs.
Did you know that 1 out of 3 people will say they don't have an infection when they know they do? Also, many don't know they have an STD. The smartest way to protect each other is for both of you to get tested.

Immunize for HPV and hepatitis B.
In most industrialized countries, hepatitis B immunizations are mandatory to attend school. Now we have an immunization for HPV. This is a very important way to protect yourself when you consider that 80 percent of women in the United States have had HPV by age 50. (I will write more about the HPV immunization next week).

Don't abuse alcohol or drugs.
Alcohol or drugs can make you forget that you promised yourself to only have safe sex. They interfere with your decision making. Did you know that alcohol actually makes sex less enjoyable for both men and women?

Condoms, condoms, condoms.
I recently gave a lecture at a local high school. Before beginning, I handed out a questionnaire. One of the questions was — why would a couple use condoms if the girl is using the pill or some other form of hormonal contraceptive? Out of 286 students, only 12 answered the question correctly. Condoms protect against STDs by forming a barrier. The barrier keeps one partner's fluids from getting into or on the other. Remember, hormonal contraceptives protect against pregnancy. The condom protects against pregnancy and disease. Carry two condoms in case one breaks or tears.

Practice safety at bars and parties.
Many of my patients have been given some form of date rape drug. These drugs are clear, odorless and tasteless so the victims have no idea they are drinking it. As a result of consuming the drug, some of these women have been raped. Others have not. This experience is very unsettling to all of them regardless of the outcome. Those who have not been raped have one thing in common; they have gone out with a group of friends who agree that they will all stay together and leave together. Always keep your drink in your sight. If you forget, pour it out and purchase a new one. No drink is worth the risk.

These suggestions are not a guarantee that you will never acquire an STD but they will greatly reduce your risk. Safer sex is one way to show you care. Please share your comments.

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