- With Mayo Clinic certified nurse-midwife
Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
read biographyclose windowBiography of
Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
Mary Murry is a certified nurse-midwife in the Department of Obstetrics & Gynecology at Mayo Clinic, Rochester, Minn.
Murry, a Cincinnati native, has been a nurse-midwife practitioner for more than 20 years and is an instructor at the College of Medicine, Mayo Clinic. She was a contributing reviewer and writer of the "Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy" book.
Her research interests include adult female survivors of sexual abuse, women's perception of pain in labor, and obesity in pregnancy.
Latest entries
- Foreskin: To keep or not to keep?
May 21, 2013
- Travel during pregnancy
May 7, 2013
- Gas in pregnancy
April 23, 2013
- Varicose veins and pregnancy: Legs and more
April 10, 2013
- You're pregnant! How will you share the news?
March 26, 2013
Free
E-newsletter
Subscribe to Housecall
Our weekly general interest
e-newsletter keeps you up to date
on a wide variety of health topics.
Mayo Clinic Housecall
Stay up to date on the latest health information.
What you get
- Free weekly e-newsletter
- Mayo Clinic expertise
- Recipes, tools and other helpful information
- We do not share your e-mail address
Pregnancy and you blog
-
Dec. 5, 2008
Intimacy after pregnancy and delivery: Is there such a thing?
By Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
I am sorry for the very long period of silence in my blog. I was ill and in the hospital but am beginning to feel better now.
I had promised a follow-up on the previous article about sex in pregnancy. If you are recently delivered, you may be asking why would you ever have sex again? You are sleep deprived, you are tired of having vaginal drainage, and if breastfeeding, you have sympathy for all the cows of the world.
You might also have some fears about pain and discomfort, or be afraid that your husband might look at you in a different way after having watched you deliver a baby. I remember my fear after having my 10 pound baby was that my vagina would be too big, a cavernous, echoing vault. Silly me, everything was as it should be.
You will have sex again and it will be pleasurable again. It just might take some effort. Clear your mind to the best of your ability. If you are making a grocery list, or thinking about the laundry or keeping an ear open for the baby, you will not be enjoying yourself as much. Don't have intercourse in the same room as the baby. If you have a baby monitor, turn it off.
Some women who are nursing will worry about leaking during love making. Often, if you can keep your mind off of the baby you won't have much problem with this. Being well lubricated during intercourse can be a problem. Have a personal lubricant handy and use it; some for you, some for him. Basically you should adopt the rule, the slipperier the better.
In my opinion the most important rule is to take your time. It doesn't have to happen until you are ready. If you try and it is uncomfortable, wait and try in a few days. Keep communication open and loving. Oh yes, do use birth control if you don't want another baby right away.
Please share your experiences and questions with us.
12 comments posted
April 14, 2013 9:29 a.m.
Thank you for the article. I'll tell you the content of an article about pregnancy to my wife. Cheers ....
- andreas
March 29, 2013 10:36 a.m.
Nice articles about pregnancy, I will tell my friends who needs the knowledge about pregnancy
- andreas
August 23, 2012 1:24 p.m.
As a recent patron of "The Sex Diet" books, (http://www.thesexdiet.com if you haven't heard of it all over the news lol), it concerned me when I found out I was pregnant, because here I was partaking in a very rigorous sex routine, and became frightened about what my husband might start thinking about my body. It was important for me to keep the weight off while I bore my child. He calmed my mind about this, but I still worry what might happen after I give birth. The book has helped us become closer sexually, and deal with problems like this, but it doesn't have a section on post-birth. Is there post-partum for men? Telling me I will have great sex again gives me hope at least. Thnx Mary. -Yola
- Yolanda
July 10, 2012 5:53 a.m.
The habit of smoking must be avoided as it leads to certain complications like miscarriage. Miscarriage is one of the common results of smoking during pregnancy. It must be stopped in order to avoid birth defects and the risk of miscarriage.
- Smoking during pregnancy
June 12, 2012 3:31 a.m.
Thanks God for your good health. I ever listen that you can sex til early signs of labour . Is this fine for baby?
- zoii
May 25, 2012 6:12 a.m.
If this desire stops then i think each mother only have single baby. But i think don't stop pregnancy just have some gap between two kids. It is better for mothers as well as for babies health and always should prefer natural ways to induce labour
- Zoii
October 22, 2011 9:37 p.m.
Vitamins for Memory also helps pregnant women to maintain the baby's heath while it is still in his tummy.
- Anna Breault
June 10, 2011 5:35 a.m.
That's really thininkg out of the box. Thanks!
- Tracen
December 6, 2010 3:24 p.m.
Many breastfeeding women experience some vaginal dryness. Some like you experience extreme dryness that is not helped by the usual lpersonal lubricants. This is usually a result of the decrease in estrogen. The cream your doctor gave you is probably an estrogen cream. The dryness comes back when you stop using the cream because your body is still supression your estrogen. You should experience an improvement in your dryness after your baby is about 6 months old. You can continue to use the cream as well as personal lubrucants. If you don't get any relief, I would check back with your doctor for further evaluation.
- Mary @ Mayo
November 30, 2010 10:17 a.m.
I have a 4.5month old and I am breastfeeding. Intercourse is still painful and I have minor discomfort in my vag region. My Doc said it was not a yeast infection but the result of extreme dryness and possible irritation from soap/detergent. He gave me a cream to deal with the discomfort but when I stop using it the daily discomfort returns. The cream does not help with intercourse pain. Is this normal? Any suggestions? We have tried lots of lub, taking it slow, and waiting a few days to try again. I am beginning to worry something is wrong. Thanks
- momwithpain
June 20, 2010 3:07 p.m.
thnk you for sharing travesti
- travesti
December 10, 2008 6:47 a.m.
I am a menopausal mom who adopted a baby boy at 2 days old with my hubby. I had no desire for sex for 1 year, it hurt so bad.I was also nursing our baby too and that was also part of the dryness problem too. But, I now have the problem solved! I am using a natural vag creme that is called estradiol-estriol , and it has worked wonders! I feel like my old self before menopause and before nursing!
- welovethechildren
Share on:
12 comments posted