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    Edward T. Creagan, M.D.

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  • July 30, 2009

    Blog: Reach out to help and be helped

    By Edward T. Creagan, M.D.

6 comments posted

"The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty."

Need more help?

If the stress in your life is more than you can cope with, get help right away.

  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
    1-800-273-TALK (8255)
  • Go to the nearest hospital or emergency room
  • Call your physician, health provider or clergy
  • National Alliance on Mental Illness
    www.nami.org
    1-800-950-NAMI (6264)

As this quote from Mother Teresa so eloquently says, being alone is a dreadful burden. And as readers of this blog often note, we need the support of others to deal with the realities of life. As a practicing clinician and a hospice physician, this helps me understand the power of organizations such as Alcoholics Anonymous and other support groups that help patients and families cope with profound challenges.

Although we play different roles and have different titles and credentials, we all have the same fundamental needs. If I am struggling with an issue or a problem I know that others must also be dealing with it. I try to reach out to them and ask how we can help one another tackle the challenge.

I often speak on issues of stress and burnout. During these lectures, I learn so much from the audience, who share their experiences dealing with the big and the little issues. I have now come to believe that there is no such thing as a "little issue." If we do not have the necessary skills, even the smallest inconvenience can tip us over the edge.

This is why I underscore the importance of staying connected to others and taking care of ourselves. We are assaulted every day with bad news and ominous developments over which we have no control. However, we can control our attitude and our faith in each other and the future.

We are all pilgrims on the same road. How can we help each other?

6 comments posted

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  • August 20, 2009 10:20 a.m.

    Dr Creagen I am a woman with deep faith in the Lord and I wanted to tell you I appreciate your articles. I am a nurse health coach and use them to coach mbr's across the US on depression, suicide, stress, etc. You seem very genuine and real and it comes through the articles. thank you and I hope you keep writing more on faih and how it affects your health. God bless you.

    - Tammy

  • August 4, 2009 10:45 p.m.

    To Ann. When I am alone, I turn on the TV for company. I love the travel channel, the history channel, even cnn, the news channel. Most of all though, I love EWTN, which is a very fine religious channel. It is very comforting. I wish your siblings were kinder to you and help you out. They do not realize how good it would make them feel to be there for you. It would have made your parents very happy to know that you are all there for one another. Best wishes, Liz S.

    - Liz

  • August 4, 2009 3:17 p.m.

    Mother theresa was right, the loneliness of being unwanted, but sick too is horrendous, deaf, using a scooter, multiple disabilities and neuro probs and rehoused recently due to disability and not one member of my family helped in any way. I live alone. My twin has PD and will be coming home, good or bad i do not know. How can this Irish family call themselves christian and go to mass etc and leave there 'little sister' to fend for self? being deaf limits the ability to communicate, being brain damage limits my understanding of social discourse, so I dont do well with people. sort it i want to, how i do not know, save to say lonliness is the sickness not all the rest that is going on in a wracked body.

    - ann

  • July 31, 2009 10:09 p.m.

    Dear Anonymous - You have the courage to say no to your previous friends activities; so pat yourself on the back! Keep positive and try to help others. The rewrds will bw well worth it. John

    - John

  • July 31, 2009 9:26 a.m.

    Dear Anonymous - Thank you for your note. You might try seeking out situations to meet others such as classes, church connections, volunteer work and community activities such as United Way, animal sheters or your local YMCA. We need to gently move out of our comfort zones. When we do, we may find that doors start to open to us.

    - Ed Creagan

  • July 30, 2009 2:38 p.m.

    I am in a serious relationship of 4 years so far, someone I will marry, but my friends (who all happened to be without partners) got into other things which I do not approve of and living a dangerous lifestyle. We just stopped hanging out all together. I just thought I would find other friends and kept telling myself I would. So far it has been 3 years since I have been friendless. My parents I cannot talk to about anything without them telling me I am wrong or yelling. Therefore, I have one person to confide in for everything and when he is not there or with his friends, I have no one. I realize I need to find other friends but am not sure how. Is there a support group for that?

    - Anonymous

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