Stress management

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• August 3, 2012 11:36 a.m.

  Yet more sound,comforting and supportive advice from the doctor. It's so true that you can't choose how others act but you can choose how to react. Thankyou

  - Stephen

• October 4, 2011 5:03 a.m.

  it is true that relationship problems do not really stress us out but HOW we react to the problems that's what drains our energy. So if you are facing relationship problems the best way to do is be open minded and never dwell on what hurts you instead focus on how to solve the issues to be able to find solutions.

  - relationship problems

• August 21, 2011 5:51 a.m.

  How true it is that we must choose our relationships with care,we are very careless many time when choosing relationships and then wonder why we are so stressed out over the relationship. Great information.

  - Crystal

• April 19, 2011 6:41 a.m.

  It is totally true that we are the masters of our emotions and we should never let them to control us. Maintaining our peace of mind is the most thing that person can do in a relationship.

  - Joe

• December 9, 2010 2:07 p.m.

  "Relationship problems start and end with you " As Carl Sandburg said -time is the only coin we have and it's us determine how to spend this time coin. I agree that relationship starts ans ends with you and nobody else. In modern era, for online dating or offline dating, it depends on you when,with whom and when to start a relationship for friendship, intimacy or ..... Be confident and cautious. Be honest and trustworthy.

  - Beautifulmingles

• May 25, 2010 4:52 a.m.

  I agree that emotional problems in relationships are caused by our reaction to our partner's actions which are driven by our own emotional baggage. I agree that peace of mind is precious and once its lost it would be hard to regain it. However, letting go of emotional problems is easier said than done. It is actually a process that entails incremental changes in behavior. It would be helpful to read marriage counseling bookss, for one, to find tips on how to positively react to your partner and how to handle relationship-related stresses. There can be a lot of means to cope with relationship problems. But before exerting any effort, you should have a clear understanding of your self and of how much value you give on your relationship. That way, you will know the extent that you're willing to compromise to make the relationship work.

  - Richard

• December 10, 2009 9:29 p.m.

  Sometimes it can be difficult to maintain a sense of equanimity when dealing with difficult people. How can one maintain peace when living with someone who is abusive or an alcoholic? At times, attaining that peace may involve loving confrontation, designed to help someone who is dysfunctional. As a cousin of mine, who was married to an alcoholic, says: "Peace involves living in the eye of the storm." Daily prayer, meditation, and forgiveness play a big role in keeping a sense of composure when dealing with "God's heavenly sandpaper." Barbara, author of "Cry Depression, Celebrate Recovery."

  - Barbara

• August 20, 2009 11:27 a.m.

  It's hard for me to express my displeasure with others actions or comments because I find that I'm stressing about how they will inturn react to me! I know that I'm responsible for my well being but what would you suggest to someone who is uncomfortable with conflict?

  - Marie

• August 16, 2009 2:09 p.m.

  The article reminds me of the phrase that ( Every action has its own reaction ) So here also the relationship will reflect the way how someone has in his or her mind to the other.

  - Ironsteel

• August 14, 2009 10:22 a.m.

  I am coming to realize the truth of "choose your attitude" -- "happiness is a choice" -- type of advice. But it can be very very hard to make that choice. And, you can't let that choice blind you to what is sometimes harsh reality. We do need to grieve, we do need to consider the what ifs, we do need to experience regret, and to ask for forgiveness...we just need to know how and when to move on. A hard situation is still a hard situation...but as Roberta says, we don't have to let it have complete control of us. Where is your focus? That is what counts.

  - susan

• August 13, 2009 9:44 a.m.

  When I feel stressed out by what I think are the intentions of others, I repeat this mantra: "I refuse to give them the power to make me feel miserable." Then I relax and enjoy the situation.

  - Rpberta S.

• August 12, 2009 3:51 p.m.

  I really appreciate this blog, i had heard about this prebiously but today it seemed to actualy sink in I have been trying all kinds of things to gain control of my patience with my kids and husband. it seems that after i had my baby twins i lost all of my patience and became really irritated whenever things didn't go how i had it planned. but putting your thought in play i can see how i can apply this in my life and gain control by not letting myself loose my patience. thank you i will work on this immediately you have made a big difference for me. Thanks!

  - annonymous

• August 12, 2009 12:35 p.m.

  Totally agree with you. Having been through widowhood, breast cancer, and taking care of my younger sister who had 3 strokes at 56, I had to maintain some sense of control over my emotional reactions to other people. Be they family members, friends, acquaintances, they all have made inappropriate comments to the situation. Serenity in my daily life was imperative and I did it through meditation early in the morning. I shut out the noises and did not go in crowds or traffic. My peaceful home, gardening and reading were my routine for the past three years. Dr. Wayne W. Dyer's book "Change Your Thoughts--Change Your Life" was my daily bible for two years. I am much better now and ready to move on to new situations.

  - jeanine