Depression (major depression)

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• November 30, 2011 10:21 p.m.

  I am Depressed. But I get even more depressed reading this blog. Maybe we depressed people should read more uplifting things. I am going to do that now.

  - FG

• August 14, 2011 10:03 p.m.

  dear Bet: welcome to the blog, i'm glad u wrote in, sounds like u have a very stressful life rite now, just so u no u can always come here & there will always b someone here 2 talk 2, i'm sorry about your sister, believe me the people on this web-site do understand your depression & how hard it is to go thru, u don't say if you're on any medicine?? back surgery-that sounds pretty serious-do u have anyone that will be there 2 help u?? anytime u wanna talk (day or nite) u can write here, hope this helped you, good luck to you & write back & let me know how you're doing??

  - denise

• August 11, 2011 11:35 a.m.

  Hi, i am new to this site also. I know my depression is chemical because i never remember a time in my life when i did not have symptoms.I also know that stress in my life recently has greatly increased my burden. I lost a sister unexpected two months ago, so i am still grieving. Then my baby got married, and i am suffering from empty nest syndrome. I used to have my job to help occupy my time, but i am on medical leave, needing surgery on my back. I not trying to complain that life is so bad, but i do know that these burdens have increased my depression, and i just wish i had someone to talk to who understands. I know millions of people suffer from depression and absolutely everyone has problems. Maybe someone out there need someone to talk to as well.

  - Bet

• July 9, 2011 10:41 a.m.

  hi guys: i don't think there is such a thing as being resilient when it comes to chemical/clinical depression, we don't & can't have control over it when it's genetic, either!! i've suffered from this for over 35 yrs. now & i haven't figured out yet how to control it, the meds. rnt even working, all i do is get miserable side effects from them, last 10 days (on pristiq), been doing nothing but sleeping, well on 2 the next one, i have a wedding in a wk., it's a 3 hr. drive, i don't no if i can even go?? talk about stress, don't wanna have to deal w. anyone saying why weren't u there or be made @ me if i don't go, booked a hotel last month when i was doing good, may have 2 cancel it, have til thurs. 2 decide, have to wait & c??

  - denise

• July 8, 2011 9:22 a.m.

  Have you ever suffered from Depression?I dont think you have.You may have a degree in psychiatry,diagnose people with depression, but until you face true depression yourself, you wont understand.My family suffers from depression. My Great Aunt mother, sister, attempted suicide, I cant count how many attempts I made since 8th grade, now im 25. We who suffer from depression know that when you are in the "depressed stage" it is very hard to do any of your ADLs in life. We wish that we could be resilient when approaching life stressors. Its alomost been 1 year, July 20, 2011, is when I was in my worse state of mind ever, I was beyond depressed, and I shot myself In the chest. My husband, next door at the fire dept.(luckily), came performed cpr, then had to use an AED. I had a collapsed lung and had to get a chest tube. I went back on med. for depression for 2 months and came off it. For 5 mths. I was doing great(no med.), now Im back on my med. because Im court ordered, and depression is back with suicidal thoughts.Im not alone, but I dont like my family to worry about me and get them depressed cause we feed off our depression. I wish I didnt have this chemical imbalance. When depressed they told me do things that I enjoy!?! Really? When depressed there is a loss of interest or pleasure in activities that you usually enjoy! So what to do? If it werent for my children, I would attempt again. Horrible to say and feel this, but true.So when you get depressed,let me no how

  - Brittany

• July 6, 2011 11:29 p.m.

  Do I suffer from Depression because I'm not resilient enough? My depressive turns are managed effectively with 10-20 mg of Lexapro. I consider myself a naturally chirpy person and quite positive. Its just that without my "brain pills" I spiral down pretty quickly. I've just assumed its purely a chemical misbalance but my sister who reckons she resilient (in fact its her buzz word) implies I have depression because I lack resilience. Its kind of a moral judgement. How do you guuys see it?

  - EE

• June 27, 2011 9:58 a.m.

  dear jamie: it's not uncommon 4 a dr. to add on another medication, in addition to the one that ur taking, i'm not a professional, just someone that's suffered from depression 4 a very long time, he probably added the trazodone to help u sleep better & it is an a.d. also, glad that you wrote in, not sure if the dr. will answer u directly, usually just people that write on this blog rite in, but feel free to write back & there's usually someone that can answer your question, good luck to you & hang in there

  - denise

• June 24, 2011 1:53 p.m.

  I have a question for the Dr: I take 20mg of lexapro daily. I also have had a problem with my sleep due to depression, so I take 150mg of Trazodone at night. Is the antidepressant not working as affectively as it should to have to add on another med? Thank you.

  - Jamie

• October 13, 2010 7:25 p.m.

  I'm new to this blog, but have been looking for others that share my feelings. Depression is something that's always with me. The severity of the symptoms or intensity of the despair is directly related to my stress level. I find as I'm getting older that it's getting more difficult to talk myself out and the duration is longer. I've lost count of how many mornings I've had to repeating to myself that things will work out and that everything will be ok. Sometimes I'm so tired and want to give up, but then I manage to pull myself together to face another day. I don't receive the support I need from my bf and don't want to worry my parents. My dad suffers from depression as well. Looking forward tovreading your posts.

  - Sandy

• October 7, 2010 10:22 a.m.

  Easy to say...be resilient! Get help! Do us a favor, when if ever you suffer the kind of depression we have....then write your little article about 'just keep on fighting'. Easy to preach, tough to walk the walk. Mayo clinic...stop admiring your wonderful reputation and get with real people. By definition, depression is the feeling of utter despair, being alone. To tell us to get 'resilient' and search for help is ridiculous. If we could do that we wouldn't be depressed now would we.

  - Beth

• September 9, 2010 5:11 p.m.

  I'm sorry, I just wanna give up anymore. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired.

  - kia

• June 27, 2010 10:53 p.m.

  I don't think resilience is possible when one has depression. A resilient personality type is probably less likely to get depressed. Resilient people are more likely to contribute to the depression in others because they are de-sensitized to what they do to people.

  - Rebecca

• June 7, 2010 9:46 p.m.

  Has anyone read Hand Me Down Blues? I think there is a lot of truth to that. I also believe at least for some it is definitely a chemical problem in the brain. There are times when my mood has come from how I'm thinking but there are also times when I'm positive my thinking had nothing to do with it; suddenly I was down.

  - jms

• June 7, 2010 9:30 p.m.

  Medication hasn't helped me very much either. It reduces the tears. What I got the most help from was the many self-help books I read to gain understanding and some ideas of things to try. I think the affirmations were helpful. I also MADE myself do things. Eventually I was able to say staying in bed is unacceptable. Just about every day is a fight with myself, some more than others. Another helpful thing I do is to journal until I've worked out whatever seems to be bothering me at the time. I can usually come to a way of thinking that changes my mood for the better - somtimes it takes 30 minutes, sometimes a few hours. I also look for 'projects' that will engage my time. For the past few years I haven't been getting out because I lost the use of my transportation. I didn't make any friends after I moved here before the depression hit me so I have no where to go but the grocery store or the mall to look at all the things I can't buy. So I'm a homebody. There are times when I get so bored I wonder why I still have to be here; when is my day coming. Well, that too is unacceptable and another change of attitude is needed. I have learned to recognize sooner when I need to pay attention and take more control over my thoughts...even so it can still catch me off guard and give me more to fight for the day or week. Some people think I am too content with this as an excuse for what I don't do. I've been this way for so long with so little change, maybe they are right.

  - jms

• March 31, 2010 9:36 p.m.

  I can really relate to BC. I feel as if I am reading my story. I think that what sets off my depression is the nasty behavior of people at work. They only think of themselves, what will people think and they are just about production to get their bonus and recognition of their superiors - often at the expense of people. For the longest of time what helped me was to have pity for these people that don't understand the importance of love and respect of others. I am losing faith in man kind...I am turning to prayer, faith to build resilience and compassion - I don't have any more. Hang on for the ride everyone. There is a reason for everything.

  - sg

• March 22, 2010 11:38 a.m.

  A support group for Depression and Chronic Pain would be a great idea, I know that I could really use one too, if you find one, let me know!

  - Sara

• March 18, 2010 4:58 a.m.

  I am looking for a support group for persons with CHRONIC PAIN AND DEPRESSION.

  - Carey

• March 2, 2010 2:03 a.m.

  Excellent site, keep up the good work. I read a lot of blogs on a daily basis and for the most part, people lack substance but, I just wanted to make a quick comment to say I’m glad I found your blog. Thanks ======= Shelly Street Fights

  - shelly

• February 28, 2010 1:06 p.m.

  Reading your blogs letting me know I am not alone. I can't accept this illness. It is so crippling. I had so much high hopes for my career but all the stress has brought on another bad episode. This is my third episode. All of them have been connected to work and stress. I'm not sure what to do - give up my career and move on - hoping to find something else I can be so connected to. That in itself is the problem - all I do is work - type A personality, perfectionism and high stress has made it difficult to join clubs and socialize. I have never joined a club all I have done is family and work. Now with my boys older all I do is eat, sleep and work. I am so tired. I am off work right now. I have to contimplate half-time or LTD. I don't like these options as my salary is high and I had hopes to help my sons through school, go on trips and buy equipment to use on our farm. I can't break the thoughts that I am letting everyone down. I had such hopes for myself - depression has such a hold right now all I want to do is sleep. I am on cymbalta and it was supposed to give me energy but my brain and body just tells me to sleep. I am looking for advise on how to accept this disease (they all tell me to look at it that way) and move on as it is time to make some life changes . All I want to do is shake myself, kick myself in the butt - and get back to life and work. What can I do?

  - BC

• February 20, 2010 8:52 p.m.

  I am Bi-polar and while Effexor was a wonder drug for me for 6 months it suddenly stopped working and I even became suicidal again. Now I have been struggling since November to find that 'right drug' (of course I have tried many others). As I get older the 'new' drug gets harder to find and the side effects are worse and I am having a terrible time withdrawing from effexor. BUT my credo is "Fake it till you make it". Most people do not know I have this problem. Some days getting out of bed and just getting dressed is a tremendous effort but I 'make believe' I am just a normal person. Overeating is a tremendous problem as food is so comforting but can be a compulsive eating problem too. Even though I am overweight, I stay involved at a health club where other people care about me if I don't show up. My biggest challenge was when my husband died 3 years ago when he fell in the shower and hit his head. I came home and found him dead, he was 58 and we were married 36 years. I was in a deep depression for a long time but didn't kill myself and now I just have a different life without him. Sometimes as I try to 'act normal' I suddenly realize I have actually become 'normal' in that moment in time. It's not easy and don't expect other people to understand what it is like because you can't see depression so just "Fake it till you make it" and all of a sudden you may not be 'faking it'...

  - Ellen

• February 18, 2010 11:58 a.m.

  I agree that social outlets help lift the funk, but the depression makes it very difficult for me to make or maintain contacts. Working from home does not help...so isolated. Therapy doesn't help anymore, either -- how many times can you say, "I just feel bad?" "I don't think I'm ever going to enjoy anything again?"

  - R

• January 30, 2010 10:19 a.m.

  As the saying goes: Half the battle is just showing up. So do your best to be around people, even if you don't feel like socializing. Exercise is helpful too. If you just don't feel energetic enough, do anything that gets you moving, it doesn't need to be strenuous. Do not be too hard on yourself if you move slowly and think slowly and can't do everything you used to do. It takes time but you will get better.

  - Susan

• January 30, 2010 12:04 a.m.

  I used to have a friend who would, no matter how hard I argued, MAKE me do things with him. He would physically drag me out of my bed, dress me, and FORCE me to go places with him. I loved him for it. I was miserable most of the time, but he did this so positively and lovingly that it made me forget that I was depressed. He's a few cities away now, and my depression has worsened, but If there's ever a time where I make the choice to fight it off, I always think of him. He was my knight in shining armor. He made it okay for me to feel what I was feeling, but not okay to give into it. He always exclaimed: THROW yourself into social situations! Fake it until you feel it! God bless that boy.

  - Michelle

• January 23, 2010 10:03 p.m.

  Sara, My heart goes out to you. I struggle with my depression and have many times thought. I didn't want to live. Last night in bed I decided that the greatest HELP I have is: E exersize, Lights (I also have Seasonal Affective Disorder) I feel peace when I sit under the lights- and P prayer. Honestly I have been helped soo much in that way, even though when I am depressed it is very hard to pray. Sometimes I Just plead "help me, help me" Jenny

  - Jenny

• January 21, 2010 11:53 a.m.

  Ok this is Sara again and I messed up in my original comment a bit sorry. 2006 suicide attempt I was hospitalized and attended intensive group, individual, and ECT therapies. Right now I am taking Pristiq for my depression and at first in 2007 thought it was working but I dont think it is helping at all now. I could go on for another 1500 words but I dont wanna bore any of you any longer. But, seriously if anyone can help me please I beg of you please help me thanks.

  - Sara