• image.alt
  • With Mayo Clinic oncologist

    Edward T. Creagan, M.D.

    read biography
The Mayo Clinic Diet Book, learn more

Free

E-newsletter

Subscribe to Housecall

Our weekly general interest
e-newsletter keeps you up to date on a wide variety of health topics.

Sign up now
  • Stress blog

  • Feb. 3, 2011

    Count to 10 before hitting send

    By Edward T. Creagan, M.D.

3 comments posted

Last week one of my colleagues, a respected researcher, watched her project evaporate with the stroke of an accountant's pen. She was devastated. She was angry. She was ready to shoot off a flaming email. But instead she took several days to deliberate about her situation. She then chose to explain to leadership in a calm but forceful way the unfairness of the situation. She knew she was right, but she also recognized that the situation wasn't going to change.

Need more help?

If the stress in your life is more than you can cope with, get help right away.

  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
    1-800-273-TALK (8255)
  • Go to the nearest hospital or emergency room
  • Call your physician, health provider or clergy
  • National Alliance on Mental Illness
    www.nami.org
    1-800-950-NAMI (6264)

She could have complained and attacked the system, but she understood that the cost would've been too great. She chose instead to close that chapter and to move on with dignity and poise.

My colleague set an admirable example that others would be well advised to follow. She had the wisdom not to react in haste. She took the time to let her feelings subside. Only then, after careful deliberation, did she respond.

3 comments posted

blog index
  • February 9, 2011 1:27 p.m.

    Sometimes it's helpful to put your feelings in writing, for yourself...either write or put the information in a personal document. Sometimes, the very act of writing gives an outlet for the frustation. It also allows you to go back and examine what the issues were, whether you were part of the problem, whether you can actually do anything about, etc. Then, you can destroy the document and let it go. For some reason the act of writing let's you vent to yourself. The act of destroying the document is part of the letting go. If there is a way to address the problem, as a previous writer wrote, Let someone you trust read it to see if the content is appropriate and accurate before you send it on to anyone.

    - Lu

  • February 5, 2011 4:16 p.m.

    Reflect and pause, when emotions are heated. This can prevent a future stressful situation. There's no reason to immediately vent. When I question whether my emotions are surfacing in an e-mail I often have a trusted person take a look at it. I often then delay and soften my communication after taking this step. Makes my life more calm.

    - Alma

  • February 4, 2011 1:52 p.m.

    If we all took the time to let our feelings subside, we can be made amicable with virtually any opposing views. Were is the balance? However, letting our feelings subside where the response would have been an immediate tongue lashing is wise.

    - Lizbeth

Post a comment
  • Print
  • Share on:

  • Email

Advertisement


Text Size: smaller largerlarger