- With Mayo Clinic certified nurse-midwife
Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
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Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
Mary Murry is a certified nurse-midwife in the Department of Obstetrics & Gynecology at Mayo Clinic, Rochester, Minn.
Murry, a Cincinnati native, has been a nurse-midwife practitioner for more than 20 years and is an instructor at the College of Medicine, Mayo Clinic. She was a contributing reviewer and writer of the "Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy" book.
Her research interests include adult female survivors of sexual abuse, women's perception of pain in labor, and obesity in pregnancy.
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Pregnancy and you blog
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March 16, 2011
Family planning: No more babies?
By Mary M. Murry, R.N., C.N.M.
At some point most women seem to say, "Enough is enough. No more babies for me." Knowing when the time is right can be challenging, though, considering the what ifs. What if my child — or one of my children — becomes seriously ill or dies? What if I get remarried? What if I win the lottery? There's no easy way to know for sure.
I think of myself as having two voices — the one in my heart and the one in my head. Years ago my head told me that two children were enough while my heart screamed, "Just one more!" I listened to my heart, and baby number three turned 22 last week. To this day, my heart turns to mush at the sight of a baby. Now, however, my ever-sensible head overrides my heart by reminding me of wet diapers, sore breasts, sleepless nights and day care. These days, my head speaks louder than my heart.
If you're certain that you don't want any more children, discuss it with your partner. This could be one of the most important decisions you'll make for your family.
If you agree that your family is complete, the next question is probably what to do about birth control. For example, you might want to stick with your present form of birth control or switch to something long-lasting — such as an IUD or implantable rod. You might also opt for something permanent, such as a vasectomy or tubal ligation.
If you're considering a permanent method of birth control, remember that a decision as big as this one takes time and thought. Do your research, and discuss any concerns with your health care provider. Make sure you have the information you need — and the time you need to process it — before you do anything permanent. Maybe you, too, must listen to more than one voice.
2 comments posted
July 29, 2011 8:36 a.m.
There are other options such as natural family planning that are not mentioned here. If you are going to list so many choices why not add the full spectrum...let people know all of their options! Thanks!
- liz
April 28, 2011 4:20 p.m.
I was not planning on having more children. I also was feeling safe and confident with my partner of six years as he has retrograde ejaculation due to back surgery. We decided to end our relationship and I was intimate with an old friend on the second day of my period. My ex partner and I had intercourse on the 15th or 16th day of my cycle during which he did ejaculate a large amount of fluid. Is it possible that my pregnancy resulted from intercourse during the 2nd day of my cycle or is it more probable that I conceived with my former partner since the fluid was present.
- Tracy
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