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How to be happy: Tips for cultivating contentment

Are you tired of waiting around for happiness to find you? Stop waiting and start getting happy with these tips.

By Mayo Clinic staff

Do you know how to be happy? Or are you waiting for happiness to find you?

Despite what the fairy tales depict, happiness doesn't appear by magic. It's not even something that happens to you. It's something you can cultivate.

So, what are you waiting for? Start discovering how to be happy.

How to be happy: What science tells us

Only 10 percent or so of the variation in people's reports of happiness can be explained by differences in their circumstances. It appears that the bulk of what determines happiness is due to personality and — more importantly — thoughts and behaviors that can be changed.

So, yes, you can learn how to be happy — or at least happier.

Although you may have thought, as many people do, that happiness comes from being born rich or beautiful or living a stress-free life, the reality is that people who have wealth, beauty or less stress are not happier on average than those of who don't enjoy those blessings.

People who are happy seem to intuitively know that their happiness is the sum of their life choices, and their lives are built on the following pillars:

  • Devoting time to family and friends
  • Appreciating what they have
  • Maintaining an optimistic outlook
  • Feeling a sense of purpose
  • Living in the moment

How to be happy: Practice, practice, practice

If you have been looking for happiness, the good news is that your choices, thoughts and actions can influence your level of happiness. It's not as easy as flipping a switch, but you can turn up your happiness level. Here's how to get started on the path to creating a happier you.

Invest in relationships

Surround yourself with happy people. Being around people who are content buoys your own mood. And by being happy yourself, you give something back to those around you.

Friends and family help you celebrate life's successes and support you in difficult times. Although it's easy to take friends and family for granted, these relationships need nurturing.

Build up your emotional account with kind words and actions. Be careful and gracious with critique. Let people know that you appreciate what they do for you or even just that you're glad they're part of your life.

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References
  1. Lyubomirsky S. The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want. New York, N.Y.: Penguin; 2007:14.
  2. Baker D, et al. What Happy People Know: How the New Science of Happiness Can Change Your Life for the Better. Emmaus, Pa.: Rodale; 2003:39.
  3. Hill AL, et al. Emotions as infectious diseases in a large social network: The SISa model. Proceedings Biological Sciences. 2010;277:3827.
  4. Sood A. Log On: Two Steps to Mindful Awareness. Rochester, Minn.: Morning Dew Publications; 2009:28.
  5. Snyder CR, et al. Positive Psychology: The Scientific and Practical Exploration of Human Strengths. Thousand Oaks, Calif.: Sage Publications; 2007:145.
  6. Sood A. Train Your Brain, Engage Your Heart, Transform Your Life. Rochester, Minn.: Morning Dew Publications; 2010:11.
MY01357 Sept. 15, 2012

© 1998-2013 Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research (MFMER). All rights reserved. A single copy of these materials may be reprinted for noncommercial personal use only. "Mayo," "Mayo Clinic," "MayoClinic.com," "EmbodyHealth," "Enhance your life," and the triple-shield Mayo Clinic logo are trademarks of Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research.

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