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New dad: Tips to help manage stress
Becoming a new dad can bring joy — and stress. Find out how to deal with the difficulties of parenthood and develop a rewarding relationship with your newborn.
By Mayo Clinic staffBecoming a father can be an exciting and overwhelming experience. As a new dad, however, you can take many steps to prepare for the emotions and challenges of fatherhood and connect with your newly expanded family. Understand how to make your transition into fatherhood less stressful and more fulfilling.
Recognize sources of stress
No one said taking care of a newborn would be easy. As a new dad, you may worry about:
- Limited paternity leave. If you aren't able to take time off when the baby is born, it may be difficult to keep up your regular work schedule and find time to spend with your newborn.
- New responsibilities. Newborns require constant care and attention. On top of feedings, diaper changes and crying spells — tasks for which some new dads aren't prepared — parents must find time to do household chores and other daily activities. If you're used to a carefree, independent lifestyle, you may have trouble accepting your new responsibilities.
- Disrupted sleep. Newborns challenge their parents' ability to get a good night's sleep. Sleep deprivation can quickly take a toll on new dads and moms.
- Financial strain. The cost of your baby's delivery, health care, diapers, clothing and furniture can add up quickly. The financial strain may be worse if you move to a bigger home or pay someone to take care of the baby while you work — or one of you takes unpaid leave or quits work to take care of the baby.
- Less time with your partner. Having a baby means sharing your partner's attention with a third party. You may feel left out, especially if your partner breast-feeds the baby.
- Loss of sexual activity. Your partner's health care provider may prohibit sex for the first few weeks after she delivers the baby. Even then, your partner may not be interested in sex due to physical exhaustion and stress. This can lead to resentment and strain your relationship.
- Depression. Research shows that — like mothers — some fathers may experience depression shortly after a child's birth.
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References
- Condon J. What about dad? Psychosocial and mental health issue for new fathers. Australian Family Physician. 2006;35:690.
- Boyce P, et al. First-time fathers' study: Psychological distress in expectant fathers during pregnancy. Australian and New Zealand Journal of Psychiatry. 2007;41:718.
- Halle CC, et al. Supporting fathers in the transition to parenthood. Contemporary Nurse: A Journal for the Australian Nursing Profession. 2008;31:57.
- Buist AA, et al. Men's adjustment to fatherhood: Implications for obstetric health care. Journal of Obstetric, Gynecologic, and Neonatal Nursing. 2003;32:172.
- Premberg AA, et al. Experiences of the first year as father. Scandinavian Journal of Caring Sciences. 2008;22:56.
- Ramchandani P, et al. Paternal depression in the postnatal period and child development: A prospective population study. 2005;365:2201.
- Draper J. 'It's the first scientific evidence': Men's experience of pregnancy confirmation. Journal of Advanced Nursing. 2002;39:563.
- Henwood K, et al. 'The good father': Reading men's accounts of paternal involvement during the transition to first-time fatherhood. British Journal of Social Psychology. 2003;42:337.
- Parenting corner Q&A: Fathers. American Academy of Pediatrics. http://www.aap.org/publiced/BK0_Fathers.htm. Accessed Jan. 1, 2010.
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