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Sex after pregnancy: Let your body set the pace
You've just delivered a baby. Is it safe to have sex? Will it hurt? What if you're not interested? Here are answers to common questions about sex after pregnancy.
By Mayo Clinic staffSex after pregnancy happens. Honestly. But first, vaginal soreness and sheer exhaustion are likely to take a toll. Whether you're in the mood or sex is the last thing on your mind, here's what you need to know about sex after pregnancy.
After the baby is born, how soon can I have sex?
Whether you give birth vaginally or by C-section, your body will need time to heal. Many doctors recommend waiting four to six weeks before resuming intercourse. This allows time for the cervix to close, postpartum bleeding to stop, and any tears or repaired lacerations to heal.
But the other important timeline is your own. Some women feel ready to resume sex within a few weeks of giving birth, while others need a few months — or even longer. Factors such as fatigue, postpartum blues and changes in body image may take a toll on your sex drive.
Will it hurt?
Your vagina may be dry and tender, especially if you're breast-feeding. To ease any discomfort, take it slow. Start with cuddling, kissing or massage. Gradually build the intensity of stimulation. If vaginal dryness is a problem, use a lubricating cream or gel. Try different positions to take pressure off any sore areas and control penetration. Tell your partner what feels good — and what doesn't.
It's also important to stay centered on the moment. For most women, sexual response requires the entire brain. Keep your mind on yourself and your partner — not the diapers, laundry and other household chores.
If sex continues to be painful, consult your doctor. A low-dose estrogen cream applied to the vagina may help. Rarely, complications of healing may require additional treatment.
Will it feel different?
After several vaginal deliveries, decreased muscle tone in the vagina may reduce pleasurable friction during sex — which can influence arousal.
To tone your pelvic floor muscles, do Kegel exercises. Simply tighten your pelvic muscles as if you're stopping your stream of urine. Try it for five seconds at a time, four or five times in a row. Work up to keeping the muscles contracted for 10 seconds at a time, relaxing for 10 seconds between contractions. Once you've got the hang of it, do at least three sets of 10 Kegel exercises a day.
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