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Talking to kids about sex (5)
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Sex education: Talking to toddlers and preschoolers about sex
Curiosity about others
By age 3 or 4, children often realize that boys and girls have different genitals. As natural curiosity kicks in, you may find your child playing "doctor" or examining another child's sex organs. Such exploration is far removed from adult sexual activity, and it's harmless when only young children are involved. As a family matter, however, you may want to set limits on such exploration.
Everyday moments are key
Sex education isn't a single tell-all discussion. Instead, take advantage of everyday opportunities to discuss sex. If there's a pregnancy in the family, for example, tell your child that babies grow in a special place inside the mother. If your child wants more details on how the baby got there or how the baby will be born, offer them.
Consider these examples:
- How do babies get inside a mommy's tummy? You might say, "A mom and a dad make a baby by holding each other in a special way."
- How are babies born? For some kids, it might be enough to say, "Doctors and nurses help babies who are ready to be born." If your child wants more details, you might say, "Usually a mom pushes the baby out of her vagina."
- Why doesn't everyone have a penis? Try a simple explanation, such as, "Boys and girls bodies are made differently."
- Why do you have hair down there? Simplicity often works here, too. You might say, "Our bodies change as we get older." If your child wants more details, add, "Boys grow hair near their penises, and girls grow hair near their vaginas."
As your child matures and asks more-detailed questions, you can provide more-detailed responses. Answer specific questions using correct terminology. Even if you're uncomfortable, forge ahead. Remember, you're setting the stage for open, honest discussions in the years to come.Previous page
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- Talking with your young child about sex. American Academy of Pediatrics. http://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/preschool/pages/Talking-to-Your-Young-Child-About-Sex.aspx. Accessed Feb. 8, 2011.
- Talking to your kids. American Social Health Association. http://www.ashastd.org/parents/parents_overview.cfm. Accessed Feb. 8, 2011.
- Masturbation. American Academy of Pediatrics. http://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/gradeschool/puberty/Pages/Masturbation.aspx. Accessed Feb. 8, 2011.
- Child sexual abuse. American Social Health Association. http://www.aacap.org/cs/root/facts_for_families/child_sexual_abuse. Accessed Feb. 8, 2011.