Mayo Clinic Health Manager

Get free personalized health guidance for you and your family.

Get Started

Free

E-Newsletter

Subscribe to receive the latest updates on health topics. About our newsletters

  • Housecall
  • Alzheimer's caregiving
  • Living with cancer

Sex education: Talking to toddlers and preschoolers about sex

Sex education often begins with a child's curiosity about his or her body. Here's how to set the stage for sex education — and how to answer your child's questions.

By Mayo Clinic staff

Sex education is a topic many parents would prefer to avoid. And if you have a young child, you might think you're off the hook — at least for a while. But that's not necessarily true. Sex education can begin anytime. Let your child set the pace with his or her questions.

Early exploration

As children learn to walk and talk, they also begin to learn about their bodies. Open the door to sex education by teaching your child the proper names for his or her sex organs, perhaps during bath time. If your child points to a body part, simply tell him or her what it is. This is also a good time to talk about which parts of the body are private.

When your child asks questions about his or her body — or yours — don't giggle, laugh or get embarrassed. Take the questions at face value. Offer direct, age-appropriate responses. If your child wants to know more, he or she will ask.

Expect self-stimulation

Many toddlers express their natural sexual curiosity through self-stimulation. Boys may pull at their penises, and girls may rub their external genitalia. Teach your child that masturbation is a normal — but private — activity. If your child starts masturbating in public, try to distract him or her. If that fails, take your child aside for a reminder about the importance of privacy.

Sometimes, frequent masturbation can indicate a problem in a child's life. Perhaps he or she feels anxious or isn't receiving enough attention at home. It can even be a sign of sexual abuse. Teach your child that no one is allowed to touch the private parts of his or her body without permission. If you're concerned about your child's behavior, consult his or her doctor.

Next page
(1 of 2)
References
  1. At what age should I start talking to my child about sex? American Academy of Pediatrics. http://www.aap.org/publiced/BR_TalkSexChild.htm. Accessed Jan. 16, 2009.
  2. What is sexuality education and why is it important? American Social Health Association. http://www.ashastd.org/parents/parents_overview.cfm. Accessed Jan. 16, 2009.
  3. Johnston MV. Conditions that mimic seizures. In: Kliegman RM, et al. Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics. 18th ed. Philadelphia, Pa.: Saunders Elsevier; 2007. http://www.mdconsult.com/das/book/body/116850359-3/792846969/1608/1355.html#4-u1.0-B978-1-4160-2450-7..50596-X--cesec19_10877. Accessed Jan. 16, 2009.
  4. Feigelman S. The preschool years. In: Kliegman RM, et al. Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics. 18th ed. Philadelphia, Pa.: Saunders Elsevier; 2007. http://www.mdconsult.com/das/book/body/116850359-5/792856521/1608/24.html#4-u1.0-B978-1-4160-2450-7..50012-8--cesec10_199. Accessed Jan. 16, 2009.

HQ00547

April 25, 2009

© 1998-2009 Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research (MFMER). All rights reserved. A single copy of these materials may be reprinted for noncommercial personal use only. "Mayo," "Mayo Clinic," "MayoClinic.com," "EmbodyHealth," "Reliable tools for healthier lives," "Enhance your life," and the triple-shield Mayo Clinic logo are trademarks of Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research.

Print Share Reprints

Text Size: smaller largerlarger